Sunday, February 28, 2010

when the sun rises

Sunday mornings are meant to relax. Where do you go, how do you find that place where nothing is? I look outside and it is peaceful, the sun is shining and the weeds are growing. Inside I hear the heater heating and I know she is sleeping. Life should be easy. Uncomfortable I sit and feel as if my chest is going to crack open to expose the horrible red goo that is contained inside my skin. It will not stop, it will not go away, it is mine and I own it. Wanting to sit but not knowing how can make the soul uneasy at times. Forget it, let it go is what is taught in classes by people from foreign countries who have far less than us and still seem happy. I’m jealous and wish I could participate in the tranquility of others. The mind goes and the heart races some stupid race that has no finish other than death. Is that it, is that all we have to look forward to, I don’t know. I fill my life with projects and goals waiting for the end to come. Busy keeps the mind from wondering. Fill it up with tasks and chores and the soul will have no time to complain. Click it goes on and life begins again. In she walks, I’m distracted by her beauty and peace. My life mellow and I know it will be alright.

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